My dear, dear Patricia:
It is when I address you that I reaize the inadequacy of words. You are dearer to me now than anyone else I know yet, were I to repeat dear, dear Patricia, over and over, any number of times, I would end feeling tht I had made only a feeble attempt at expressing myself. But perhaps, as I have implied before, this may be as things should be. Were I able completely to express myself, there would be naught left to say, and perhaps nothing or little left to know - or perhaps I would have exhausted my potential for understanding and appreciating and that would be a sad state of affairs to be in. so as long as you can remain the most beautiful person I have ever known, the most remarkable influence I have ever experienced and the embodiment of all the hopes and expectations I could have for another, all must be well. So long as I can see and hear you and communicate with you occasionally, my cup of happiness will be full.
Who, but you would be able to write an inscription on a book as you did in the little one you gave me - only yesterday, wasn’t it - and say so much and hold out the promise of so much more? I love the little picture of you. it reveals so much of your personality - the gentle yet penetrating look into the future and into the universe of one who feels and sees and understands much, who faces the future with calmness, courage, and conviction, ready to go wherever fate and circumstances may lead, but one who will influence all things and persons encoungered and all events in which you share. If I am “the carl you’ll never know” it will be only because “forever” will not be long enough to exhaust the potential of our friendship and affection. I am reminded of an Indian proverb that “no man bathes twice in the same stream.” By the time he returns to it a second time, he has changed and the stream has changed. I believe it will be the same with us. as long as we participate as vital entities in the world of people and the vast universe in which we find ourselves, at each meeting each of us will have learned and experienced since the last meeting, so that each will have something new and different to bring to the meeting and there will always be the promise of more wonders to come.
Over and over I thank my lucky stars for the circumstances that gave me the chance to know you and be drawn into the magic circle of your friendship and affection. I continue to look at all the women I meet, [page 2] of all ages and types, and though I see many that are fascinating and attractive, it still is true that not one I have seen measures up to you in total beauty - inside and out. A light shines out through your eyes that could ionly come from one who - though still young - has experienced much and understood much - yet has grown in sympathy for all others. And so, once again, I salute you! what more can I do.
Thanks again for the little book. The love poems and love letters that grace its pages are universal in their appeal. I shall read it many, many times and eventually memorize all that it contains - or known them by heart - since they touch the heart - and because they will have become part of me - and they will always symbolize you - “the beautiful Patricia I know - the Patricia I’ll never fully know, though I have ten thousand years.” (credit to you and Robert Burns for the thoughts)
Doris (your mom - not just any Doris) have been on the phone about four times today. First she wanted to know if I knew when she’d have a good chance to phone you. I suggested the end of the school day to between 5:00 and 5:30 and it worked. Later I told her I had the little juniper she wanted and-“when should I bring it out? Along with some celery juice?” she said, well, if you are free you could bring them out tonight - so I took them out - also the two boxes of clothes. She’s about as busy as you are so only took time for a peep at the clothes tonight. She was delighted with the juniper. I got a “Hollywood juniper - juniperous torulosa (it’s the kind she wanted) from the Leonard Coates nursery at 2201 the Alameda. I found the same man there who used to wait on me 25 years ago (when you were quite small) he cut the price from $1.75 to $1.35 for me as an old customer and gave me a green stake (1/2 in square) to put in the groupd beside it and trin it to keep its main stem erect. I got a realy little beauty - about 2 ft. tall in a gallon can.
I’ll go out again tomorrow evening and help Leon plant it at the corner of the porch. We’ll also plant one your mom got at at one of the stores she went to today - it’s one of the low growing spready ones to fill in the place across the front of the porch where she wants to take out the “frog fingered” broad leaf plants that are there.
The celery juice I got was the freshest ever. Heidi’s had just made it about 10 minutes before I arrived - but I had the Devil’s own time getting through the traffic. It took me fifteen minutes to drive around the block that has “Penney’s” and Heidi’s in it just once. I finally put the car in the parking lot behind Penney’s and learned that now the parking lot “honors all validation” but I don’t know if Penney’s does. The trouble last time, when we used the lot, was that [page 3] Penney’s wouldn’t stamp anyone’s ticket.
I note on the Circle Theatre announcement that “Oliver” runs three weeks from November 16 to December 5 so in the stretch of time there should be one day when the examination pressure should be low enough to allow you the respite of a play. So, as soon as you can find out how the exam schedule cuts across (or misses) that 3 week period, I’ll get the tickets.
And I must thank you for the delightful “day” I’ve had since 5:15 yesteday when we started to dinner. I am grateful for your company last night in the “study hour” after dinner. Call me anytime you need a repeat. You can have all the space and quiet you need. But - I’d like to emphasize how much happiness it brought me to take you from place to place today - the clinic, Penney’s, the admin building, the liquid lunch and back to the college. Any time I can do things for you and especially with you - even though they are just little [?] I hope you’ll call on me, while you are at 220 Margaret and whenever you move to afterward. Such little services afford brief opportunities to visit, they get jobs done for you and save you extra energy that you should be spared since you had your auto accident. To me they are all joyful interludes, and they do not use up time in the more important hours of the evenings or other times when you want to be with someone else, to study or do other things. So never, never, think of these services as impositions on my time, and do, do call on me frequently. They help to make my weeks vital and exciting!
I get my radio back tomorrow. It is ready, I learned by phone but my car is acting up another way. The starter is misbehaving as it did a few weeks back - just buzzing without turning the motor. Luckily it didn’t misbehave today when I was chauffeuring you. I’ll try to have it fixed tomorrow.
I brought the batik hanging back from M.P. yesterday - no, Wednesday. Soon as it is cleaned I’ll let you see how beautiful it is. It’s really a priceless item now. Most so called “batiks” today are just printed on the cloth. This was made according to the mothd of the ancient batik art. It came from Java. Nothing like it is available now, so far as I know and hasn’t been for 20 years or more. I paid $9.00 for it and it probably is worth $75.00 now.
Well darling, three sheets of paper, both sides will demand (more of your time than I have a right to expect - but I still haven’t said all there is to tell you. that’s the beauty of knowing you. our contacts seem inexhaustible. So, from a full heart - thanks again for everything and may the future hold much more! Don’t forget - call me when you are ready to pack your books, etc. Love and sweet dreams, Carl.