My darling Patricia:
I hope you don’t mind my calling you darling occasionally, because that’s what you are in my eyes – and in the words of the popular song, a few years ago, “you’re a sweetheart, if there ever was one” and I hope that you’ll continue to let me play adopted father to you as long as possible. I delight in every aspect of it.
You’ll never know what a lift it gave me to find you in when I drove by this afternoon. I’d felt so down and blue over being the cause of your mom’s unhappiness and it cheered me beyond words to find you so gleeful and happy over your new purchases in the way of your handsome shoes and the sweater. I don’t know if I saw all that you brought – if not you can show me the rest next time I’m over.
Also I was delighted over your enthusiasm over “my fair lady” and I could listen to you sing for hours! You have a lovely voice and you put so much feeling into your singing!
You delight me the way you reveal that you’ve satisfied your soul with a few more clothes, or whatever it is you need that you’ve spent money for. Personally, I don’t care as long as it meets a need for you and I know you have such good taste and so would never spend money foolishly. You’re as delightful as a “little girl” should be in showing something to a beloved parent (I hope I qualify) and I only hope I can [page2] last long enough to see some of your most cherished dreams realized. I’ll be looking forward now to that 25th birthday of yours – there you’d set your heart on – and nothing can make me happier than to be able to feel that I’ve helped you to reach your goal for the occasion.
I’ll watch for everything you do musically, dramatically, or otherwise and be present to see and enjoy or help you to enjoy all that I have any right to share in. And I’ll eagerly await an account of the things that I am excluded from by circumstances.
I should declare now also, since I’m in the mood how happy I was to feel the trust you showed in me when you asked me to stand by your in your personal crisis with Sylvia and when you thanked me tonight on this PM or other [?] by you. I’ll look forward to your standing by me when I have personal crises – and do occasionally.
Right now I’ll say – though I have to mention of and there may be no need at all to do so – that if a certain one of my relatives in law should ever get inquisitive and ask you – it wouldn’t be beyond her if she got the idea – whether I am partly supporting you (at one time she thought I must be – though she has no knowledge whatsoever) – tell her only that I’ve brought you a few books on such occasions as Christmas and birthday – as I’ve bought for her own daughter (and twice as many for the daughter) and that, by taking a few bundles of groceries out to your family, I’ve saved you the necessity of dividing your small earnings as a student assistant to help your family – and that’s all. Anything else is nobody’s business absolutely. What I’ve done, I’ve done for you because I want to and as I’ve told you not another soul needs to know a thing about that. There probably will never be a call on you – but if there should be – on the long chance we’ll at least tell the same story.
I shouldn’t have to say anything like this to you at all – ever – and [page 3] assuming that the time never comes – all will be fine. All I need is to see the look of happiness in your face as you had it today – to have the feeling that you trust me and to know in my heart as I do – that all is wll and fine between us.
You provide the inspiration that lifts me to the skies – and that is all I ask – but that as a mark of some measure of appreciation I need. In your own words,
Thank you for being you! If it weren’t so late – as I’ve just got back from a delightful evening at [?] I’d phone you to say goodnight as I suggested – and as you’ve done for me a couple of times, but it’s so late now, I haven’t got the nerve to wake you up – for you must have turned in already.
However – please call me in the morning when you wake up. I’ll be here at the hotel working on the home stretch of finishing my grades. They have to be in by 5:00 PM tomorrow.
And I’m thinking what night to reserve for the movies. Of [?] are now or soon – we’ll be able to get a second one in before the ‘tween semester break is over.
Then I’ll probably have to run up to Chico for a couple of days to see my older sister who’ll be visiting my younger sister Joyce. I’ll phone and find out when. Well good night darling, I hope you have a blissful, restful night. Affectionately, Carl.